When Your Partner Says It’s Over; 7 Ways to Cope with Break-Ups

When Your Partner Says It’s Over; 7 Ways to Cope with Break-Ups

Regardless of where you live, your social status, or your occupation, if you’re a human being you’re likely either involved in a close relationship or hoping to get into or out of one. The human condition is such that we strive to develop a close emotional connection with someone who we can spend our life with.

You’ll probably experience times when you’re with someone who wants to leave the relationship. Those words, “It’s over,” can be some of the most painful words you’ll ever hear.

These suggestions will help you cope with the loss of a love relationship:

    1. Acknowledge that the relationship has ended. You might have difficulty with the idea that you won’t be seeing or spending time with the person anymore. Admit to yourself that however you feel about him/her, it’s done.
    2. Process what happened. This step will be emotionally challenging, yet going through your “emotional file cabinet” of what has gone on in the relationship will ultimately help you get through the break-up. From your point of view, what happened?
    3. Ponder how the two of you related. It’s especially important to be realistic whenever you’re considering the most basic thing about the relationship—how you communicated with each other.
      • How did you get along? Were there times you couldn’t adequately convey your thoughts and needs? Or that he couldn’t convey his ideas and wants to you?
    4. Be honest about what didn’t work between you. Although you might tend to get caught up in the emotional pain and angst of the ending of a relationship, it’s important to have your eyes wide open regarding the rough spots.
      • Sure, maybe you both loved football and enjoyed eating Italian on Friday nights, but what didn’t you do so well together?
      • It will be enlightening for you to get real about what wasn’t working between the two of you. Otherwise, you’ll struggle to draw conclusions about the relationship, which is necessary for you to move on emotionally.
    5. Baby yourself a bit. After all, you’ve been through an emotionally devastating event. Because you want to get through this trauma and live out your life with serenity and happiness, it’s perfectly acceptable to take time to engage in activities that bring comfort and solace.
    6. Be active even if you don’t feel like it. Whether it’s visiting friends or going for your morning jog, continue engaging in an active lifestyle to encourage your emotional healing. You’ll be invigorated by the physical regimen and it will serve to lift your mood.
    7. Draw your own conclusions. As time passes, you’ll notice you’re successfully “sorting out” what happened in your past relationship. And you’ll also see that you’ve formulated your own ideas about what actually occurred between you.
      • For example: “Oh, we just didn’t agree on how a good relationship works” or “He just couldn’t accept that I wanted to spend time with my friends” or “I guess I tried to control how he spent his spare time and he didn’t like that.”
      • Whatever conclusion you arrive at will help you enjoy healthy relationships in the future.

When you hear, “It’s over,” you might be emotionally immobilized. But if you apply these strategies, you’ll skillfully work through the break-up and arrive at your own ideas about why the relationship ended. Then, use that information to aid you in moving on with your life.

You can successfully cope with the aftermath of a lost love to discover your new and improved life that’s waiting.

3 Crucial Steps to Healing a Broken Heart

3 Crucial Steps to Healing a Broken Heart

3 Crucial Steps to Healing a Broken Heart

The pain that we feel when our relationship with someone we love is ended can be very intense. Common symptoms of a broken heart include sadness, crying, and feeling physical aches and pains in the heart and body.

Symptoms of your grief can interfere with your health, well-being, and ability to function in your daily life!

If you’re dealing with the effects of a broken heart, you might be tempted to deny your feelings or withdraw from others so that no one can get close enough to hurt you again. However, denial and withdrawal are unproductive strategies.

Luckily, there are steps you can take to help you heal and move on, no matter how much time has passed since your break-up.

Try these strategies to begin to heal your broken heart today:

  1. Cut off all contact and physically remove all reminders of your former love. Mementos from your life together hold you back from moving on. Just as a physical wound is unable to heal if you keep picking off the scab, holding on to anything that reminds you of your ex is simply going to prolong your misery.
    • Get rid of your ex’s belongings. If they no longer want these items, donate them to a thrift store or charity that accepts used clothing and similar items.
    • Remove pictures, gifts, love letters, or anything else that reminds you of your ex. Removing these reminders will help you to stop obsessing and rehashing past events.
    • Remember your online and digital profiles. Delete every picture, text, and email that you received from your ex, and remove their information from your devices.
    • Contact your friends and family members and let them know that the relationship is over. Ask them to avoid bringing up your ex. If your loved ones are having trouble complying with your request, you may need to limit your contact with them for a while.
    • Stop going to the places that you frequented as a couple.
    • By removing the physical reminders of your past life together, you’re literally clearing out both your mind and heart. This will allow you to grow and make a new life for yourself.
  2. Take care of yourself as you heal. While it’s tempting to throw yourself into your work or drown your sorrows with too much food and alcohol, harmful escapes will only cause you to feel worse in the long run.
    • Eat healthy foods and consider joining an exercise class that helps you socialize while releasing excess energy and getting fit.
    • Start a new hobby. Great choices include taking classes to learn a new language or skill, or becoming a volunteer at a local school or charity.
    • Focus on coping strategies that will boost your health and self-esteem.
  3. Remain calm if you run into your ex. If you live in the same town, chances are great that you’ll eventually run into your former love. Prepare yourself for this eventuality so that you can cope effectively. Focus on your breathing, and keep any exchange brief and polite.

Healing from a broken heart isn’t easy, but practicing these strategies will help you to begin the process. If you can heal your broken heart, you’ll be free, ready, and strong enough to love again, maybe even sooner than you think.