Category: Mind

Fall in Love with Yourself!

Louise Hay attributes all physical health conditions to lack of love for the self.  Instead of telling yourself negative messages, try mirror work and tell yourself how much you love everything about you.  As this clip from a Luc Besson film shows though, that can be incredibly challenging if you’ve criticised yourself for most of your life.

So start small!  Find one thing to genuinely love about yourself and compliment yourself on that first. It could be something as simple as the colour of your eyes, or the fact that you treat people kindly.  Keep repeating the message, until it feels easy, then find something else and build on the foundation of self-love you are creating.  Find a time when you’ll be able to do it every day, perhaps whilst you’re brushing your teeth and already standing in front of a mirror anyway.

But keep doing it, because you’re worth it… Heart3.2 copy

 

Why Self-Care is So Important after a Loss

A Funny Little Story to Share with You about Manifesting!

I take my child to school on the bus and one day last week, on my way home after dropping him off, I was pondering whether the bus driver receives any other indication that a passenger wants to get off the bus, apart from the audible bell when someone presses the button. I pressed the bell for my stop and when it got closer to where I get off, I noticed the driver wasn’t slowing down, so I stood up and headed to the front of the bus.
 
As we came almost alongside my stop with no sign of stopping, I pressed the button again and the driver asked me if I wanted the stop we were just passing. I laughed and said “Yes! I DID press the bell earlier, but perhaps you didn’t hear it…”. He laughed too and said “Sorry! My phone went off so I thought the bell I heard was just THAT, and there isn’t any other indicator to let me know someone wants to get off the bus!”.
 
He pulled over just after my stop and I got off with a cheery thank you and goodbye, and silently thanked the Universe for so quickly answering my question 😀 I’ve ridden on buses for YEARS and never had the driver go past the stop I want after ringing the bell, so this DID make me laugh!!
Heart

How it Feels to Have a Chronic Health Condition Breakthrough!

Hey amazing LoveYourLifers! I asked on a mastermind group I’m part of a couple of weeks ago about setting goals when one has a chronic health condition and they came up with some beautiful suggestions 🙂
 
Following that post, I set an intention that I was going to open my mind even further to different healing modalities, even though I’m already into alternative and holistic health anyway, but the methods I’ve tried so far hadn’t given any real relief.
 
I also felt very down and negative about my health (exacerbated by quite severe pregnancy nausea too, which has been hanging on for three months now). So I dropped down into a bit of a whinge-fest for a couple of days and allowed myself to really FEEL the frustration and loss of health/lifestyle I’ve experienced over the last few years, and let myself truly wallow in how shit it feels sometimes, when I’m usually trying to smile and put a positive face on!
 
And because I allowed myself permission to feel TRULY negative about it for a change, I suddenly reached a place of positivity and hope for the first time since I became ill, and my mind was then drawn to a book that I’ve had on my shelf and read once years ago, but it didn’t really resonate at the time – “You Can Heal Your Life” by Louise Hay. I picked it up and started reading (bearing in mind that since I became unwell, I’ve been unable to read properly too – hell for a passionate bookworm like me!), and things started to click into place in my mind! Then I remembered I also had the DVD of the same name, so I watched that! And my goodness, that really resonated with me too!!
 
I was also sent a Groupon notification about a massive discount on a nutritional therapist training course, and the Universe nudged me (well, screamed at me is probably more accurate!) to sign up, so I did! And the information I’ve gleaned so far from that is really resonating with me, all about epigenetics and how different genes can get switched on depending on the nutritional and emotional environment within the body, which can lead to different symptoms/health conditions (but more importantly, can also lead the genes to be switched OFF again when you change the nutritional and emotional environment within the body, potentially switching off the symptoms/health conditions too, even genetic ones like mine and my children’s!).
 
So now I finally KNOW what my goals need to be for the next 5 months or so whilst I finish growing this baby – really dive in and do the work in the book! This is going to improve the emotional environment of my body and hopefully help switch my ‘symptom genes’ back off again 🙂 And since it can’t do any harm (unlike the pharmacological drugs that are the usual treatment prescribed, and which I’ve so far refused to take since I became unwell, so I get no real relief from the symptoms!), I can ‘treat myself’ whilst pregnant without worrying about causing the baby damage (y) So NOW I can start creating SMART goals that resonate and actually feel realistic for my current state, such as create 10 healing affirmations that I need to work on, print them out and stick them in places around the house where I will see them several times a day, etc 🙂
 
I thought I’d share my story because I know that sometimes, we can feel pressured to ALWAYS try to feel positive about the crappy things that happen and then not allow ourselves the space to really grieve and let go, when that might be the very thing we NEED to do first before healing can begin to take place. It was only when I gave myself permission to actually grieve that the (brain!) fog began to clear at last and I was able to start seeing things that would genuinely help for ME (for instance, I have a strong scientific background and logical mind and although I’ve always felt strongly drawn to the esoteric, I need scientific explanations for WHY they work to be able to ‘get’ them – the epigenetics explanation was one of those Aha moments I needed!). I’ve kept reading about how I should ‘find the gift’ of my experiences, but then I would mentally beat myself up for not being able to ‘see’ them, even after so many years of feeling unwell! But I needed to work through the grieving process first to THEN be able to see things differently, and allow my clouded vision to clear enough to be shown the next step along my path, even if I haven’t yet been shown the whole journey yet!
 
Hope this has helped someone and wishing you all well on YOUR next step of your journeys… Heart3.2 copy
Resources:
 
I’ve been through these beautiful cards and found ones that resonated with me, keeping them out to read every day and remind myself that I CAN change my thoughts about my health and body 🙂

Leonie Dawson’s Shining Biz and Life Academy – a place of love, nurturing, support and compassion, along with eCourses, meditations, and other resources to help you Love Your Life even more!  I’ve been a member for years and have gained so much from being part of this special community on the ‘net 🙂

How Ordinary People Can Live an Extraordinary Life!

How Ordinary People Can Live an Extraordinary Life!

“The effect you have on others is the most valuable currency there is”

My wonderful 9 year old son is so much like Jim Carrey! He is deeply sensitive to other people’s negative emotions and he tries so hard to transform those into positive ones by making people laugh. His auntie came to meet him when he was just a few hours old, looked into his eyes, and saw the light and laughter in them, even then. She declared that he was going to be a ‘cheeky little chap’, and he is indeed! He’s ‘the class joker’, the one who loves to make people giggle and raise their vibration. Interestingly though, he doesn’t like performing on stage – he’s a one-to-one person, tuning into individual feelings and doing what he can to help them feel better, whether it’s offering a hug, encouragement and support, or a silly joke to make them laugh.

What can YOU do today, with YOUR talents, to leave people feeling better after an interaction with you/your work…?

What if Everything You ‘Know’ About New Year is Wrong??!

As we come to the end of a year and look towards the new one, it can be a time of unsettlement in our minds.  Our minds start to ask us questions as we attempt to evaluate and judge our worth against some benchmark we’ve mentally created; “What did I achieve this year?”, “What losses did I incur?”, “Did I achieve my goals?”, “Did I even bother to SET any goals?”, and then we can slip into a sense of ourselves as a failure when we don’t ‘measure up’ to our preconceived expectations.

We can mentally put pressure on ourselves JUST by focussing on the concept of a year as a finite resource, which is contrary to the concept that the universe is abundant. So we look at that concept of these 365/6 days defined as ‘2015’ and imagine we have to achieve X,Y,Z by the time they are ‘over’.

But that’s a mental construct that keeps us trapped into limited thinking. How about seeing each new day as the start of the next cycle of 365/6 days, and giving up the idea that any goal is to be achieved within the limited container of the 365 days that have been called ‘2015’, or we’re a ‘failure’?

My 2015, as our part of the world calls it, has been pretty bloody awful in many ways; lots of letting go and releasing old attachments, illness etc etc. But there were also some highlights in there too, which I’ve added to my Page of Gratitude 🙂  I’d previously written off this cycle of 365 days as unlikely to achieve anything positive in for my business, due to all the personal challenges and transformations I’ve been going through. BUT today I’ve signed up to start a 30 day challenge for December with a biz mastermind group I’m a member of, and I’m going to see what I CAN get done between my self-care days (what I call the ‘bad days’ when I don’t feel well enough to do anything!), and see today as the start of a new cycle of 365 days to move forward from!

Just because the rest of the world tells you a year starts on Jan 1st doesn’t mean you have to stick with that thinking! Nature didn’t define Jan 1st as the start of her new year – she just continues on her journey each day, regardless of the mental constructs some of us humans place on defining and labelling her 🙂 If she HAD to choose a date to label as her new year, she’d have probably chosen a time when she was in a state of renewal, like Spring. But then, we can’t even define THAT properly because the concept of Spring differs depending on where in the world you are! Which is why it’s kind of ridiculous to slap labels onto nature in the first place 😉

We can take that view too and start exactly where we’re at right now! In those terms, nothing has failed ‘this year’ because a 365 day cycle is constantly renewing itself, just like our whole bodies are in a constant state of renewal!

Hope that helps shift your perspective to a more positive place!

Much love and support to you all, Love Your Lifers, as always… Heart3.2 copy

eds-hand1
elastigirl

People with EDS are Not Defective; We’re Superhuman!

A couple of days ago, my two sons and I went to see a genetic specialist, who confirmed a diagnosis of Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome.  To quote EDS UK, this is “… a genetic connective tissue condition that is a multi-systemic syndrome.  Connective tissue covers over 95% of your body so there is little that escapes the symptoms. ”  It’s been described as a genetic ‘defect’ or ‘mutation’, and one of the diagnostic signs is that it makes our joints extra flexible, so we can bend them beyond what  is considered normal.

In the medical community, we are considered to be somehow defective.  The extra flexibility of the joints can lead to early onset osteoarthritis, and the muscles are constantly under greater strain trying to prevent the over-flexible joints from dislocating themselves whilst carrying out normal, everyday activities.  Given the pain and fatigue I frequently feel these days, knowing that there IS a definitive reason for this is, in some ways, a relief, and means that it’s NOT just in my head; I actually DO now have a legitimate explanation for the way my body feels most days!

It’s not an easy thing to go from being fit, healthy and active to every day being punctuated by pain and exhaustion.  In my teenage years, I was a good runner.  Not the best, but good enough to win a few races and get a medal or two.  My 20s involved quite a bit of moving around the UK, getting an education and then a career, aiming to build up a good, secure income and solid foundation for my future life.  The house I currently live in was one of my pet projects when it was bought.  I dreamed of transforming it into a beautiful home to have a family in, and then move on up the property ladder.

At that time I was fit enough to dig out the garden for the pond, rewire the whole house (including the channelling out of the brickwork for the wires), put in our own central heating system,  and plaster walls. I was highly motivated, and had a strong, hard-working streak running through me, having grown up in a family of similarly strong, hard-working women who had been able to set to and get stuff done, with or without any men around!

But over the last few years, I started to notice more and more aches and pains and just put them down to getting older.  Then some days, even sitting at the computer to work became painful.  The joints in my hand ached just from holding the mouse, and my head felt too heavy for my neck, so my neck ached leading to severe migraines, several times a week.  Sometimes, the fatigue was so bad, I couldn’t even lie on my side in bed and hold my smartphone so I could carry on reading a document I was working on.

An initial diagnosis of fibromyalgia occurred in May 2011, which made some sense of how I was feeling.  But it was still quite a bitter pill to swallow at the time as being told there is no treatment for fibro is not something a busy, self-employed, home-educating, house-renovating single Mum wants to hear!  I had been hoping I was just a bit run-down, as I had big plans to build up my business and stabilise my family’s financial future by taking on extra mortgage, and didn’t want my ‘stupid body’ to ruin everything for me!

However, I don’t like to just look on the down side of things, even when it might be hard to see a positive side to a clinical diagnosis of a seemingly incurable, genetic condition!  I like to find the humour in a situation where I can, as it lessens the negative impact and effect on my mood, so here’s MY silly take on this latest life ‘challenge’…

elastigirlPeople with EDS can do things with their bodies that are considered beyond ‘normal’ for human beings; there’s another name for people like us – Superheroes!  Think about it!  In comic books, our so-called ‘defect’ would be considered a super power!  Disney Pixar even made a Superhero with powers like ours;  Elastigirl from The Incredibles!  She’s extra bendy, just like us, and her nemesis was actually called ‘Syndrome’!  Maybe Helen Parr has EDS…?!

 

eds-hand1I don’t want my boys growing up with the belief that there is something ‘wrong’ with their bodies, so I believe we can choose to embrace the body we were born into and see it as ‘special’, instead of ‘defective’!  At the very least, my boys have been having fun freaking out their friends at school with the ways they can bend their hands and fingers into positions that would make a grown man wince!

Alex, my 10 year old, was actually chuffed to be told he has EDS; he said it was cool to have a syndrome because it made him ‘different’!  And who knows?  Maybe EDS IS a step on the evolutionary path to some humans becoming like the X-Men; “a subspecies of humanity who are born with superhuman abilities”… 😀

We can’t control the kind of life we were born into, nor the kind of body.  We can’t control all the things that will happen to us as we journey through life.  We CAN control how we choose to see these things though.  We can see them as a life sentence, or a gift disguised as a challenge.  We can try to see the bigger picture and teach our children to do the same.  We can take a spiritual perspective and see it as a life lesson, chosen before we were even born.  We can try to find something funny about our life challenges.  We can even think of them as ‘cool’!

Every time you find humour

5b019aeaacd513b2da03feaf_1920

Listen to the SOS….

I’ve just been reading an ebook by Dr Robert Anthony, and in it was a lesson about the Titanic, which I’m going to paraphrase as I think it holds an important message.  

As you probably know, the Titanic was the largest ship of her time and sank in the Atlantic whilst on her maiden voyage, with the loss of many lives.  At the time she sank, there was another ship just 30 miles away, the California.  Radio communication was in its infancy during this time and the only radio operator on board the California has closed down for the night and gone to bed.  An hour later, the Titanic was sending out desperate SOS pleas. But the nearest ship, which could have arrived quickly and saved many lives, just did not hear those pleas and carried on, oblivious to the distress close by.

As we sail on the sea of life, people around us are going to hit proverbial icebergs too and cry out for help.  But humans don’t shout out ‘SOS’ or ‘Help me’.  Instead, they behave in angry ways, or are sarcastic, or sulky, or in any way that may be considered ‘attention-seeking’.  You even hear people saying “Just ignore him; he’s just looking for attention”.  

If someone is looking for attention, they have a need to be seen, for someone to notice them.  Their behaviour is their way of sending out an SOS.  

So MY plea to you today, and every day, is to not hear “I hate you”, but to hear the SOS behind it that says “Please love me; I’m hurt, I’m lost, I’m lonely”.  Don’t hear “Mind your own business” but “Help me; I’m lonely and need love”  Please see the Titanics all around us that need our help and offer it with love.  Because we’ve probably ALL been Titanics at some point in our lives….